Okay, not only did Julia leave a little hint comment on here, I've also gotten email requests to do more blogging again. So, I'll admit it, I don't like the holidays. Gasp!!!! I loved the holidays when I was growing up. We would make the 5 1/2 hour trip each way to my grandparent's house in west Texas and meet my cousins who lived in Midland and whom we saw only a couple of times a year. It was my sister and I and my two girl cousins, all of us within a five year age span. I'm not sure who had more fun, the kids or the parents and grandparents, doing many fun, giggly traditions. When I got older we did that and then went skiing in New Mexico every year. For me we were a Norman Rockwell family. Fast forward to being divorced with two young boys and the compromise was every other year. Every other year without my kids and, by then, my grandparents and cousins were far away and we never had the same family members together again. Now Lucas and Justin are in their twenties and Matt is 12 and everyone is spread around. Lucas and Justin have been in or closer to Texas than here in the last few years and so not with us. Paul swears that Matt loves it as he doesn't have to share any attention with anyone else. I think he's missing sharing it with others his own age or, especially, his brothers. Every year I swear the next we will have at least one of the holidays at a destination spot with the three kids together and every year we don't. Hence I've been in a funk and trying my best to hide it for Matt's sake which I think I do or he's so into so much he doesn't notice that I'm not. It didn't help that I had my spontaneous trip to Texas right after Christmas until after New Year's last year that was nothing short of amazing for me to pine over. I've got so much to be thankful for, things I take for granted, so much more than others have, but certainly normal for missing my kids. Remember, too, I'm the only female with all males so I'm the only one in the kitchen for these events. Sorry, but it's time for daughters-in-law. During this time of funk I was also feeling a lack of inspiration for art which is my bottom-dollar savior. So I've been a little lost. This isn't the fun stuff I want on my blog but that's all I felt I've had until just recently. On the other side of the holidays, each day I feel more like myself and that I'm coming out of the funk-though it won't be gone completely until Spring-I might get a sunny, warm trip before then. Here's my update and a pictorial update of getting my inspiration back. The horse shoe item is a wine bottle holder that Justin made for me for Christmas. They all made a pact that they would only give handmade gifts this year and what a great idea. Of course, I can't use it as it's meant to be (although I will do that too), wanted it closer to where I spend more time, and where it'd been seen the most, so it's holding books in the family room. I got plenty of good stuff for Christmas but I'm just now enjoying it as the tree and greenery come down and the new, cool things get a new home. Sooooooooo, Happy New Year, truly, and how long does a mid-life crisis last?
In the vein of loosing things, as in weight, I saw my first episode Hoarders today and yikes it scared me. I was never a hoarder until I became an artist and hoarding is part of being a collage artist. You see and buy something knowing you will have a use for it at some point in the future. Pretty soon you can't park in the garage and you have a work room that you can't walk into. This TV show scared me straight. I cleaned all the bathrooms and went through all the drawers and cabinets in them today. Got a pretty big bag of garbage, lots of past expiration meds and creams, etc. All that stuff that just gets piled up over time. It seems like I clean them out often but it must be a dream. The rhino is just proof that "I'm back" as in quirky Stephanie is back in the house. Yes I'm purging but this is one thing that I had to have from my fave store, Anthropologie, since it was a reasonable price and quite a statement. The boys hate it. It's paper mache' and covered with book pages-love it!
Today started D-day-diet day. I've gained an undisclosed amount of weight in the last six months that has made me uncomfortable in clothes (well it IS winter). I'm trying to bannish the sweatpants. What is this coincidence of low-rise jeans and my muffin top? How rude. So I'm going on a liquid diet for two weeks. I've got it all worked out. Heathy protein drink, cleansing pills, green tea pills, and the usual vitamins and meds. I need this-cookie dough is not good coming out of a blender. I know my limitations. And for the first time in my life I'm joining the gym. My doctor gave my number to the lady at the gym so hiding is out of the question now, wish me luck.
