Monday, January 4, 2010

Regrowing inspiration

Okay, not only did Julia leave a little hint comment on here, I've also gotten email requests to do more blogging again. So, I'll admit it, I don't like the holidays. Gasp!!!! I loved the holidays when I was growing up. We would make the 5 1/2 hour trip each way to my grandparent's house in west Texas and meet my cousins who lived in Midland and whom we saw only a couple of times a year. It was my sister and I and my two girl cousins, all of us within a five year age span. I'm not sure who had more fun, the kids or the parents and grandparents, doing many fun, giggly traditions. When I got older we did that and then went skiing in New Mexico every year. For me we were a Norman Rockwell family. Fast forward to being divorced with two young boys and the compromise was every other year. Every other year without my kids and, by then, my grandparents and cousins were far away and we never had the same family members together again. Now Lucas and Justin are in their twenties and Matt is 12 and everyone is spread around. Lucas and Justin have been in or closer to Texas than here in the last few years and so not with us. Paul swears that Matt loves it as he doesn't have to share any attention with anyone else. I think he's missing sharing it with others his own age or, especially, his brothers. Every year I swear the next we will have at least one of the holidays at a destination spot with the three kids together and every year we don't. Hence I've been in a funk and trying my best to hide it for Matt's sake which I think I do or he's so into so much he doesn't notice that I'm not. It didn't help that I had my spontaneous trip to Texas right after Christmas until after New Year's last year that was nothing short of amazing for me to pine over. I've got so much to be thankful for, things I take for granted, so much more than others have, but certainly normal for missing my kids. Remember, too, I'm the only female with all males so I'm the only one in the kitchen for these events. Sorry, but it's time for daughters-in-law. During this time of funk I was also feeling a lack of inspiration for art which is my bottom-dollar savior. So I've been a little lost. This isn't the fun stuff I want on my blog but that's all I felt I've had until just recently. On the other side of the holidays, each day I feel more like myself and that I'm coming out of the funk-though it won't be gone completely until Spring-I might get a sunny, warm trip before then. Here's my update and a pictorial update of getting my inspiration back. The horse shoe item is a wine bottle holder that Justin made for me for Christmas. They all made a pact that they would only give handmade gifts this year and what a great idea. Of course, I can't use it as it's meant to be (although I will do that too), wanted it closer to where I spend more time, and where it'd been seen the most, so it's holding books in the family room. I got plenty of good stuff for Christmas but I'm just now enjoying it as the tree and greenery come down and the new, cool things get a new home. Sooooooooo, Happy New Year, truly, and how long does a mid-life crisis last?

3 comments:

synctactics said...
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synctactics said...

That is one long holiday. I’m so glad it’s over.
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guide for world said...

I hope this year will be so much better than the previous. May God bless us all.
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